...and I'm the living proof.
(from the great theologian David Lee Roth, "So This Is Love")
Well, my printer let me borrow their install discs, so I'm back and running InDesign and PhotoShop at the office. It came in handy, as I realized yesterday that my wide stage banner was destroyed and I was able to design a new one in less than an hour and email it to Stickers & More, who will get the banner printed today, and 2-day aired to Cornerstone for delivery before noon on Wednesday. How 'bout that for service? I say they're great. I highly recommend them.
After all the frantic work and fixing problems this week, I'm actually looking forward to the Cornerstone Festival next week. We are leaving Saturday morning.
Question: If someone asked you: "What are the essentials of Christianity?" What would you tell them? Forgetting all the baggage and "non-essentials" (like methods of baptism, wine, communion, speaking in tongues), what are the essentials -- things you would actually not "let slide" when it comes to pursuing the truth...?
My brother's on crack
The other one's gay...
Was listening to Ear Candy by King's X today. In fact, for the last couple of days I've been listening to mp3 CDs of KX in my car. What's cool with mp3 CDs is you can burn albums and title them in chronological order, so it'll play from one album to the next. So, I went from the self-titled album to Dogman to this one. But who cares? The song I'm refering to underscores the tight bond that family holds. We love our family members with an unconditional love. So, if my brother is on crack and another one is gay, I love them. It's a wonderful thing to have family. They should all be so healthy as to have unconditional love. None of us have the perfect family, we all come up short; but yet that beautiful unconditional love is not too far away from most families.
If we can widen our scope of "family," we can influence others with love. That'd be pretty cool, huh?
"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. BUt the greatest of these is love."
whew!
just came in from mowing a bit at the HM Ranch.
I praise God for the little victories, like finding a way to get the trailer door unlocked. I figured I'd try one more time before I hooked it up to the hitch to take it in for "them" to look at. I tried the key, was able to manuever it, and then compared the vertical vs. horizontal relationship between the door knob and the deadbolt, and figured I'd try to open it with it vertical. Then I discovered that it could go clockwise horizontal, too, and viola! It opened.
I'm so thankful. It takes a good hour and a half of just driving out of my day. Perhaps now I can get to the business of preparing my talking notes for next week.
Praise the Lord, for He is good.
"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted
and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
A righteous man will have many troubles,
but the Lord delivers him from them all;
He protects all his bones,
not one of them will be broken."
(Psalm 34:18-20)
Man, I've been so close to throwing a pity party lately (if I do, I'll send out invitations via email, haha), as one thing after another keeps going crazy. Here's hoping things get better. It's hard to lift your head when your heart is heavy. But looking around at family and pondering good things, there are plenty of reasons to lighten the heart.
I have to admit, I've felt very hopeless today (Monday). My motherboard crashing/getting fried with a power surge did something awful -- it forced me to re-install 4 of my most-used programs: Adobe InDesign and Adobe PhotoShop (part of the Creative Suite package, along with Illustrator, Distiller, Acrobat); and Outlook and Word (from the MicroSoft Office package). Going to my folder and finding my 16 or 20 digit serial number/key allowed me to activate the version of Office that the emachine computer had installed on it, so that wasn't too bad to get active. Getting Outlook to import my previous address book and oh-so-important emailes I've filed away (details of a marketing trade, the contact for a publicist, or ideas about an article, for example). This became a challenge that ate away at my entire day.
Well, prior to that, I was obssessing with finding my Creative Suite discs. My wife wisely told me to set that aside and work on something else (as I thought it might be located in my garage at home). That was good advice. At 9:30pm I finally left the office, trying to be satisfied with the progress I'd made with Outlook. It's hard when you're frustrated to sense hope, to feel it, to grasp an emotion or thought-process to lift your spirit out of the depressed funk of your troubles. Dang! You can't fake hope. Hope isn't just an emotion. It's a state of mind, which effects the emotions and spirit of a man.
Just hearing Scripture, like John Thompson reading out of Corinthians in the new HM podcast, does a lot in that effort. Having someone offer some balance, like my wife offered me, is valuable. Laughing with a friend, like I finally did on the way home from work with a phone call, is also invaluable. Anything to break out of the despair of my problem. Yes, computers are a small, insignificant thing -- especially compared to real life issues -- but when my livelihood is challenged, I can get stressed.
I feel better, but I spent an hour or more pouring through my garage (even checking that filing cabinet I thought they'd be in), but to no avail. I'm not sure what I can do or am going to do with the challenges I face.
I need to get those Adobe programs loaded.
I need to wrap up my preparations for the talks I'm giving at Cornerstone.
I need to get the door lock fixed on our trailer before we can even leave for the fest.
We need to pack all the stuff we need for the festival.
All of this stuff can be stressful on their own, but to face it all now is a drag.
"...as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: in great endurance; in troubles, hardships and distresses; in beatings, imprisonments and riots; in hard work, sleepless nights and hunger; in purity, understanding, patience and kindness; in the Holy Spirit and in sincere love; in truthful speech and in the power of God; with weapons of righteousness in the right hand and in the left; through glory and dishonor, bad report and good report; genuine, yet regarded as imposters; known, yet regarded as unknown; dying, and yet we live on; beaten, and yet not killed; sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; poor, yet making many rich; having nothing, and yet possessing everything."
Wow. I'm not "commending myself," but I appreciate this passage of Scripture. I like the fact that it's real. It doesn't try to say, "the Christian's life is one of true happiness and smiles." It doesn't pretend or try to live a lie. I want to somehow be rejoicing in the midst of whatever...
Oh my.
big sigh.
My motherboard fried last Wednesday night/Thursday morning. I bought a new computer and put the old hard drive inside as its slave. I was told (and had high hopes) that I could run many of my programs from the old drive, but this is not true. A computer's motherboard holds its registry (I think) and programs that require that kind of id security won't run of an auxilary hard drive. So now I'm looking for my Creative Suites discs to install that program and, wouldn't you know it -- I can't find them!
This is frustrating.
In chapter 27 of Rees Howells, Intercessor, we see this man going through some frustrating times. He was led by the Lord to buy some more land for the school. It was a huge estate that just had a death in the family and went up for sale. Other people were trying to buy it and getting the money necessary was a real challenge, but at the eleventh hour it was settled.
It's very hard to do, but I trust that God will see me through this computer situation. I remind myself how much is riding on getting these programs (InDesign and PhotoShop) working, but I believe that this is a tiny, miniscule situation for the Lord. I praise Him now and thank Him in advance for helping see me through this.
...it still hurts after all this time.
This burning heart in me
won't let me be.
My motherboard...or should I say "the" motherboard in my work desktop computer fried yesterday. It wasn't a power source problem, it was the motherboard being fried. I took it into Best Buy, which I thought had a warranty on it (I buy warranties for notebooks, but not desktops, at least from my history/track record). It would cost more... Well, it would cost about half the price of a new computer to repair it. And if the hard drive is not damaged, I can install the hard drive from it into the new computer, which would allow me to not have to change all my hardware settings (especially in my layout software, which converts to a "post script" file for my printer). So, that's what I have done -- purchased a new "emachines" computer at Best Buy. I hope the old hard drive works!!!
Have a blessed weekend.
I appreciate people who can turn words and put them in shapes and fittings that cause us to see things differently, perhaps clearer, than before. I heard this line about a "gypsy heart" near the end of "Who's Gonna Ride Your Wild Horses" by U2. That seems a very fitting description of the human condition, wandering away from its "home" in the Lord. Wandering from place to place, trying to find a peace of mind that comes wherever it may physically be in the stillness and solid, secure "resting place" of God's presence.
When I got to work today, I soon realized that "I've got troubles, bud," as my computer refuses to turn on. I think perhaps my power supply has gone out. I might need to spend most of the day chasing this problem down. Oh well, I trust the Lord that all the information on this computer is not lost.
I read in Rees Howells, Intercessor about the first year of this new Bible College or Training Center that they opened. It did not go well, something happened, and it was reduced to a couple workers and five students. It seemed as if God wanted to test and prove to the people there and future participants that they couldn't rest and trust in their own laurels and strength, but His. Some blowout occured and the author said that it didn't make much sense to go into it so many years later, but that Howells prayed severely that God would bless those that left as much as he prayed that He'd bless those who stayed. They truly let tresspasses and sins and greivances be bygones, forgiven and forgotten.
Howells made reference in an earlier chapter about a type of spiritual forgiveness that was much deeper, more powerful and real than a simple and perhaps superficial prayer of forgiveness. This is one that practically sees and tastes calvary and washes deep into the soul. That's a lasting kind of forgiveness that might just allow the both offended parties to truly "let go" of it forever.
...and neither did Mike Kaply, Allen Rigg, or Tommy Lovelace.
hahaha
(i'm so mature)
:?)
Rees Howells returned from he and his wife's missionary work in Africa after six years. Everyone said that they'd never seen a missionary couple come on fulough looking so well. "We've been having six years' vacation," he said. They insisted that they take a rest, which they found even six weeks hard to bear. They wanted to get back at work. They charged him to share all over the English speaking world what God had been doing. He couldn't have picked a better job at the time. He said, "I couldn't think of any position to compare with that, preaching to tens of thousands of people, and the Lord bllessing. Before I was converted, I had it in me to travel the world, and gave that up, and here the Lord was giving it back."
Isn't that cool?
While speaking at an event later, he made an appeal to the large audience to surrender. The whole audience, and chairman, speakers, and congregation, rose to their feet. The speaker who was to follow decided it would be out of place to follow that, so they closed it. Right afterwards a few ministers prayed with Howells. He put before them the fact of so many young people responding to God's call and the urgent need of more training facilities in Wales, and he suggested they ask the Lord for a training college. God told him to "be careful" about what he prayed for, because God was going to build the college through him! Thus began another adventure in faith where miracles of money not being their suddenly arriving to the exact amount just minutes before it had to be paid!
God takes care of His people, doesn't He?
I've been listening to Brother, Sister, the new album from mewithoutYou and have to say the band has done it again. They have such a cool and unique sound. It's so fun to hear a good band stay good. Perhaps I can even say "a great band stay great." I get worried sometimes that a good band is going to falter or they'll run out of creative ideas. Not this time. Good stuff.
I'm planning on going to a great rock show tonight down in San Antonio. Demon Hunter, Zao, Spoken, August Burns Red, and Becoming The Archetype. Should be great.
In chapter 24 of Rees Howells, Intercessor, we read about six years of Mr. & Mrs. Howells' lives in Africa. There was some AMAZING revival going on there. Book of Acts stuff. Meetings would go on for hours (day after day), where the Holy Spirit would fall on a crowded room and people would cry and weep and praise and sing and confess their sins. What a treat this couple had. Many missionaries give their lives to the Lord and serve in mission fields and trust that their work is fruitful, seeing changes here and there and, after much labor, converts come. But the Howells had the reputation of the revivals come with them and they immediately were asked to talk and share about the blessings they had received back in Wales. This quickly turned into revivals within six weeks.
The media reported on this (and I can see this happening today...as more and more media people either become saved or acclimated to understanding spiritual things). Here's an excerpt from a report that Mrs. Bessie Porter Head gave in a booklets (Advance in Gazaland and Retrospect and Revival in Gazaland):
"...Meetings lasted from early morning till sunset, with only a short interval, the people weeping and confessing their sins, so that the missionaries could not put in a word, but simply wept with them and prayed for them. Sometimes everyone would be kneeling and confessing together in great agony of soul, and then one and another would 'get free' and begin to sing for joy. This went on day by day from Sunday till Thursday, the Spirit doing a mighty convicting work in souls and leading to confessions such as no human agency could have extorted from them..."
Howells saw only a small fraction of the people in the area not come to Christ -- and that was the married men. Apparently they resisted because of some ancient traditions about men paying 25 pounds for a bride, which meant a lot of money to a father with three of four daughters; but converted men would never sell a daughter. So money kept these men stubbornly refusing to convert. After strategically praying for their conversion, building a home and praying that married men would be hired on to work with him, he slowly but surely saw this stronghold break.
All of the marvelous things are wonderous and incredible to think of. I shrink away, though, at the patience and cost that brought them. The missionaries that the Howells came to assist had given a great many years and effort that preceded these revivals. And then Howells paid great price in prayer and lifestyle. I am so used to a fast food and instant life that I honestly find it hard to see myself paying that price. Would I be willing to pray hours a day for days and months about something? Would I put myself in an intercessor's position to see these changes happen? Man, I just don't know! And I think of the culture around me and ask, "Who will pay the price? Who will pray for souls?"
I thank God that there are some. In Austin there's this place called AHOP (Austin House of Prayer), where believers from different churches all over this city come together to blanket the city with prayer. This happens in many cities all over the world, I believe. This is a good sign.
Wouldn't you know it? I make some joke about someone catching a cold, and then I get the nastiest stomach virus from my daughter, who got it from my wife. I think the culprit germs were on the candy that my daughter gave me after the movie (we went to see Cars, funny flick). And she gave me some Mike & Ike candy (I think it was called), which were some amazingly sour gumdrop-like pieces of candy in the shape of little pills. While there was not slobber all over these candy pieces, I bet that the germs were passed from her mouth to her fingers to the pieces in the bag that she incidentaly touched. So I spent the weekend chucking up stuff. No fun at all.
It's kind of slowed me down some, which kind of feels good (if I wasn't feeling so bad). So, I've jumped into the Burn Lounge craze, which is like a hybrid of myspace and itunes. I've got my own download store, which has tons of great Christian hard music songs to sample from and download. If it is indeed the wave of the future, HM's got a lil' store now.
In the next couple of days we'll get a ton of new content on the site, so keep your eyes peeled! Lord willing, I'll get back to Rees Howells, Intercessor tomorrow.
Rees Howells once said, "There is nothing in the world better for strengthening one's faith than testings!"
He had many such testings in his life. He studied medicine, and had no "problems" with medicine, even though he saw God heal many people through him. One such test was God telling him not to give medicine to his wife who was in great trouble after childbirth. The Lord spoke to him suredly about the matter, which helped I'm sure, but still the test must've been incredibly hard.
On one trip he had absolutely no money for a train fare. The Holy Spirit asked him, "What would you do if you had the money?" He replied, "I'd go wait in the queue." The answer was to go wait in it. With about ten people ahead of him in line, the doubts came. How embarrassed he'd be when it was his turn and he had no money. But when it was just two people in front of him, a man said, "I'm sorry I can't wait any longer, but I must open my shop." And he placed 30 shillings in Howells' hand.
Once arriving at their mission base in London, they only lacked 3 things for Africa: watches, raincoats, and a fountain pen. They didn't speak to anyone about these needs, except for the Lord. Their main sponsor asked them what kind of watches they had, as his son wanted to buy them one each. He then asked about raincoats, and arranged for paying for one each. And then he said, "Have you seen this kind of fountain pen...?" What amazing provision, and how joyous that must've been. To see the Lord active in your life -- even in the "mundane" things like daily needs.
I remember the night I "came back" to the Lord. I was in my friend's room after a trial where I was put in a place to choose. I had chosen to step over the line into the Lord's kingdom, taking His side in a spiritual battle. Afterwards I felt compelled that I need to write a "resolution" to the Lord, as I knew in my heart the lifestyle changes I would have to make. It wasn't easy counting the cost, because I loved my lifestyle of partying and the potential for premarital sex. I made a mental note that I would write a resolution to the Lord, to specifically give these things up, offering myself to Him. Almost interrupting my thoughts, my friend blurted, "Do you see that pen? It's amazing. It'll write upside-down, sideways, I bet astronauts could take this up in space and write with it. Here, it's yours."
I thought, 'Wow! Well, here's the pen I will write the resolution with.' Then when I arrived home later I found a card shut inside and sticking out of the Bible I had left open earlier that day. 'How nice,' I thought, 'Someone wrote me a note. Probably my mother.' When I opened it, it was blank! 'Oh my gosh!' my mind reeled. 'I've got the pen and now I've got the paper. I will write the resolution.'
Then another funny thing happened as I pondered writing one of my two best friends in high school (Pat Zang and Steve Ivory). 'I must tell them about what happened tonight and how wonderful Jesus is.' This seemed important, and something that might take precedence over the resolution. But I also knew that the resolution was an important milestone for me to cross. I was bewildered. I did not know what to do, so I cracked open the Bible in a random spot and took my finger up in the air like a "tickle rocket" that would land in a giggling child's belly, and it found a place right next to a verse that would hopefully give me some guidance. This is not the Bible scholar's way of seeking God's will, by any stretch, but it worked for me on this night.
"Why worry about the speck in your brother's eye when you have a beam in your own? First remove the beam and then you will see clearly to take the speck from your brother's eye."
Oh my gosh! This was as direct an answer as I could get for this situation. I had already encountered several crazy "coincidences" on this date to make me a believer, so this one was just gravy. What a fun adventure. I still get excited thinking about that.
I don't understand the chapter with that heading. There is passing reference to Howells getting married to a childhood friend who had been born again in the revivals and was one of the helpers in the mission. Even faster was the passing reference to their leading "in the opposite direction -- to give up their marriage, not knowing whether it would ever be restored to them." The very next sentence states: "Only now, three years later, did the Lord's word come that their lives should be united in His service."
If Howells spends any time in Heaven looking down here and perhaps sees the words I'm typing, he won't be pleased with what I'm about to say. Perhaps in his heavenly state he has a understanding that I don't (you think?). I don't believe that God would call their marriage to end. Surely it was a misguided thing. This is very confusing, as his previous leading was either from God or it wasn't. And surely he would recognize the voice of the Lord. How could what God joined together as one be torn apart? What's the purpose of that? Being called to sacrifice is one thing, but sacrificing your marriage? I don't get it.
Later on in the same chapter they explained how God challenged them to give up their son, Samuel, for the mission field of Africa.
"'Anyone who loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me,' and now the Holy Ghost said to us, 'You must prove to Me that you love the souls of the Africans who are to live for eternity more than you love your own son.'"
His uncle and aunt took Samuel in as their own. They believed the promise that their sacrifice would yield to them 10,000 souls in Africa. After Samuel grew up he returned to his parents' side in ministry on his own accord.
Can you imagine that?
What a wonderful chapter #21 is in Rees Howells, Intercessor. It tells of a young man named Joe Evans, who was "a great helper in the work" that God was doing through Howells and the believers there. Evans got a bad hemorrhage from his lungs. The doctors ordered him to a sanatorium, which I guess is like an isolated place for people with contagious diseases to stay until they died. He came to Howells and asked if he should go to this place. It says that, "after waiting on God some days lest his judgment should be swayed by his natural desires, he told Joe to follow medical advice. It looked like a lapse of faith, but God had taught him that He steps in when natural remedies have failed. So he told Joe, 'You will be quite safe in going to the sanatorium. Probably the Lord wants to show that medicine can't do it.'"
It's interesting that Howells continued to rely on the Lord and not on his own giftings and "place of intercession," that he had "gained." I've often thought that, if God gave me the gift of healing, that I'd go to the Children's Hospital in Austin and walk the the Oncology floor and lay hands on the sick to see them raised up. I would endeavor to use every last "ounce" of healing in me to heal as many as possible. I'd love to empty out a hospital. But this is not what Howells did. He essentially had the "place" or "gift" of getting answers to prayer, of beseeching God to heal as he "took the place" of the person he was praying for.
Our Mighty and Loving Savior, Jesus the Messiah, was certainly One Who had the "gift" of healing, yet even He didn't do that. We don't read of Him going to a hospital or leper colony and clearing it out with massive healing. We do hear of sick people coming to Him and being healed, but we don't see Him seemingly using His gift with His own will and plans. Even Jesus, Who modeled for us this "Life in the Spirit," stayed in obedience to God the Father, staying sensitive to what the Spirit would tell Him.
We can assume that sometimes His Father would not tell him to heal so and so. At other times, He heard the Father tell Him what to do in order to heal another person. Even with the impartation of a gift, it is still used under the direction of God. This is very interesting. Howells didn't trust his own inclinations, which would most assuredly be a complete willingness to have someone (especially a good worker in his mission) healed. He instead relied on God to confirm things, not his own instincts.
"If the Holy Ghost had not taught me that I was only to pray the prayers He gives, I would have taken up my friend's case long before that. It was proof taht, though the place of intercession was gained, I could only use it as led by the Spirit."
While reading this chapter this morning, I got a call from a dear friend who was driving to the doctors to take a look at his prostate. He was having difficulties, which is not too rare when men reach their 40s and mid-40s. We prayed together on the phone for his healing.
When Howells "takes up your case," you can believe that he's not just going to pray a 17-second prayer and believe it to be done. He will labor in prayer for months at a time until a "breakthrough" of victory is gained. It is no small thing. It is also apparent that he doesn't "waste" time praying for something like this unless the Lord directs it. This is huge and is kind of surprising to me.
Evans went up to the Black Mountain and stayed for over two months, but was no better, so the doctors ordered him to go to a warmer climate, a tropical climate, like Madeira. When his father heard of this twice confirmed prognosis, he became roused, because he knew a rich man's son could get healed, but not his own. Just then Howells got an unexpected gift of 320 pounds. "What did I want with 320 pounds," he said, "when I could live on twopence a day!" He used the money to send Evans to Madeira, but God ordered him to go along, as Evans wasn't fit to travel alone.
What is interesting is that when arriving their choice of accomodations was luxurious. Evans stayed at the richer English hotel at "7s. 6d. a day," and Howells at the Portuguese hotel, at "4s. 2d." They found accomodations after a change, which had Howells staying at the "Sailor's Rest," which was the basement of the mission house. Through this Howells found a blockage in his love. Maybe it was the "creeping things" in that basement? He said, "I found something in me which prevented me from loving him."
"I was tired and I felt as if life wasn't worth living. I felt more like a man than a man with the Holy Ghost living in him." Wow. Who hasn't felt that way before? What an apt description of that condition!
He was taught and reminded how the "Savior loved you when you treated Him worse than the missionary has treated you." God told him, "When He was on earth, He had a position you haven't allowed Me to come up to in you -- loving others who do something against you, loving people who give their second or third best, just as if they had given you the very best."
He also had a breakthrough in praying for this guy that bugged him:
"I saw what it would be when I gained the position: the Holy Ghost in me with a perfect love, perfect forgiveness and perfect mercy towards others. You might think I would gain it in an hour. A person might say, 'You could have forgiven!' Yes, perhaps an imitation forgiveness and the thing coming back to you again. You never really forgive until you become like the Savior and can forgive like Him. Several times I thought it was real and that I loved the missionary, until I saw him. Then other feelings would return!"
He finally had his victory and broke through. The next day someone visited him and complained about his accomodations. This was a perfect excuse to agree with the complaint and get mad at the missionary again, but he didn't complain. In fact, he showed true gratitude. This would not have been possible just a day before the breakthrough. Very interesting.
Later on Howells and Evans were tested when told that their healing would come in a month. They made preparations for leaving prior to the healing coming, even though they couldn't see it. The day came and went and Evans was downcast, not healed. Howells was inspired to send a cable back home on the day of healing, but hadn't done it. The Lord pointed that out and it became a point of faith. When he sent the cable, which was one word, "Victory," his hands were dripping with perspiration. It was a real battle inside him.
The next day at noon it says, "the Lord came down on Joe like a shower of rain, and he was healed on the spot." This had a huge impact on the doctors that said this was impossible.
It's always sad when someone you love is sick. My wife was complaining about how bad she felt when she went to bed. Something disagreed with her stomach. We had eaten at Chuckie Cheese Pizza Parlor yesterday afternoon and in the middle of the night I was awakened with that dastardly sound. Cleaning up after someone you love is seldom a chore. Besides pinching my nose when I got close to the mess, it was no big deal. I wonder how I can take that attitude in serving others? It's one thing to serve your wife or family, but another to serve someone you don't know (or even don't like)? But that would be the way to do it, if it were possible to love others in such a way as to serve them with no thought of the cost or the effort being exerted.
I'm a bachelor this week as my wife went back to the Southern part of Texas (nothing's worse than driving when sick, but she's feeling better now) to help her best friend care for a sweet little girl. The papers have been filed, so she should be discharged to stay somewhere else than the hospital. She'll need to go in just once a day for changing the dressings. From talking to my wife just a little bit, I've found out that it's much worse than I even thought. The sweet little girl has no skin on her behind and the back of her legs. The pain that it must be when they change dressings! They scrub hard with soap and stuff. OUCH! It's painful to think about, much less experience. I've talked with people close to me that've said they'd rather not live than go through burn recovery (if 50% or more of their body was covered with third degree burns). The pain is just incredibly unbearable.
So, moving right along to Rees Howells, Intercessor, the 20th chapter is titled: "Called Out From Wage Earning." One thing that is pointed out about this man is that he did not live in some "pie in the sky" monastary existence. He worked seven hours a day in a mine shaft -- digging for coal! Talk about earning his keep! Wow.
God called him to take a step of faith and leave his job, though. God promised to take care of Him if he only trusted in Him and nothing else. He so trusted God that, in the first month of this new adventure, he told the enemy that he wasn't even going to pray during that entire first month about money, fully trusting God as much as he had trusted his employer before.
On the last day of the month (which Howells spent on a Black Mountainside -- yes, cue the Zeppelin instrumental -- just spending intimate time praising His God) he was arguing with his dad, who thought it was a good idea to take the mine owner's offer for the job position that he'd held open. He tried to explain to his dad that his Lord was faithful, and it wasn't as crazy as it sounded. As they were talking a postman delivered a letter, which had a ministry position invitation for the London City Mission, offering a 100 pounds a year (I guess a salary that'd take care of him), and both he and his dad burst out laughing and rejoicing at God's provision.
My wife's best friend has been a foster parent to a little girl. She picked her up shortly after she was born and has cared for her for about a year or more, I think. She has the most beautiful black skin and big brown eyes, with a loving smile that we've seen often at our house.
It was a terrible pain two months ago when the State of Texas granted the natural father immediate and total custody of that little child. The baby was placed into our friend's care. Our friend had high hopes of being able to adopt her. This father came into the picture late and, even though most of the case workers recommended a gentle transition towards him getting custody (proving his worth with a one-hour unsupervised visit, followed by a four-hour, followed by overnight, followed by a weekend maybe), the caseworker directly assigned to her recommended full and immediate custody be given to the father. My friend had met him a few times and sadly admitted that she genuinely kinda liked the guy (i.e. thought he'd be a good dad). It was hard to see my friend have to deal with the separation of losing that little girl that had changed her home and brought so much joy to her life. It was such a testimony to see our friend give love so unconditionally, with now not ever getting to see her again (except maybe during one follow-up medical exam by the doctor who'd regularly seen her during the past year).
Suddenly she got a phone call yesterday afternoon from the caseworker. "How would you like to adopt her?" she asked. She followed with the bad news: she'd suffered third degree burns over 13% of her body. This caseworker has to feel absolutely miserable, because she did not know that this couple would mistreat this poor little girl so horribly. The girlfriend is the chief suspect, but the wounds show that this burn event happened over five days ago, so the boyfriend/father is for sure complicit with the action of not taking the baby in for this threatening condition.
My wife is with her friend now several hours away, watching over and playing with her as the long road to healing begins. It will bring joy if our friend can now finally adopt this baby girl, but oh what a tragic road to get there. I'm told the caseworker wasn't allowed to travel to the city to be a part of these proceedings, as she's been deemed "too emotional." One can understand.
Please pray for the little girl, my wife's friend, my wife, this caseworker (who just has to feel awful about all this), and the father and girlfriend, too (who, even though they've just participated in a monsterous, hateful act, can be transformed by a miracle-working God).
The latest chapter of Rees Howells, Intercessor is called "Uncle Dick's Healing." The Lord had brought Howells through periods of intercession where "he gained that place," to where other specific needs/acts/miracles/answers could take place. One morning as he prayed he heard the Lord speak to him that his uncle would get healed. This made him very happy, as he'd been an invalid for 30 years. When he arrived at his uncle's house for his weekly visit, his uncle was all smiles as usual and asked him, "Has the Lord spoken to you lately?" He was anxious to hear what exciting new thing God was doing.
"Yes," Howells answered. "He spoke to me about you!" After hearing the news, Uncle Dick went out back and sought the Lord about this. He came back and said, "Yep. In four and one half months I'll be healed." Town people thought they were crazy. They had no explanation for the time table, so they didn't offer one. He got sicker soon thereafter. People said he'd die in four and a half months, not be healed (some friends, huh?). As the day got closer, Uncle Dick was told that this date was actually Pentecost Sunday, and that he'd be healed at 5 am. Like most nights, he couldn't sleep from the pain, and was aroused at 2 am. The enemy had taunted him almost the entire 4.5 months, and this moment was no exception. "It is all up. You are just the same now as any other night, and you have only got three hours." But he fell into a deep sleep and woke up with the clock striking 5 am and was completely restored!
What a joy it must have been for all those in the region to see a living, breathing, walking miracle. I wish we'd see more of that.
You think you have no fear?
I think you have just not been tested.
Testing will show whether you have fear...
This is something I've gleaned from chapter 18 of Rees Howells, Intercessor. "People may think they have no fear when really they have never been tested. I thought I would have no fear of going against the world and its opinions and that it was the easiest thing to be dead to it -- but it was the greatest error I ever believed. I had to be pulled through inch by inch; it was the process of sanctification, when the self-nature and all its lusts had to be changed for the divine nature (Romans 6:6; 2 Peter 1:4)."
God impressed upon Howells to take a "Nazarite vow" -- and not let a razor touch his head -- as he interceded for a friend's son. It brought disgrace to his family and parents, as he looked very unkept. People spread rumors about him, yet he felt called to silence. He didn't even clear up the rumors. That would be the hard part for me, I think. Knowing that I could just go downstairs, tell my parents that I had taken a Nazarite vow and would shave after a breakthrough in prayer occured, and then the rumors would stop. But he would have none of this. That takes a lot of patience and willingness to obey, I tell ya. It's one thing for people to believe a negative truth about you, but when they are believing a lie ... man, every fibre of my body would want to reveal the truth. It would be incredibly difficult to go through what Jesus did, too. (duh) To be falsely accused and punished for something He didn't do (declare that He would tear down a temple and other such things). All He had to do was stand up and speak up for Himself. To not do so had to take incredible restraint.
Sometimes following God can be a very lonely place. But what rewards can come from private and alone times with the Lord!
Thursday was kind of wild, as I remembered a few days before -- 'Oh yeah, that publicist invited me to any nearby HIM shows on this tour.' He told me that tickets would be mailed to me. Then the day before the show I had heard nothing, and was told that they'd be overnighted. So, on Thursday, I had no word, no tracking numbers, and no packages from Fed Ex. Come to find out (late in the afternoon) that they were in an Austin Fed Ex location. So, with very little time to go (too little time to catch opening act Aiden), I headed South to San Antonio. Austin is the "live music capital of the world," but a lot of touring shows bypass Austin in favor of this other multi-million inhabited city nearby. Bands like Rush, and shows like Ozzfest and Warped Tour hit San Antonio on a regular basis.
I have to admit, I love this band HIM. They sing about death and flirt with evil imagery, and their sound isn't something that hasn't been heard before, it's just that they're about the only ones doing it currently, and they sound so good at it. I was told they'd go on at 9:30 pm, so my late departure shouldn't have hurt my chances. Problem is it's just about impossible to find a parking place in downtown San Antonio. Even some of the paid parking lots seemed scary. I pulled into a hotel parking lot and saw the prices at the gate (about $16) and turned around and found a $5 lot not too much further from the venue -- Sunset Station. The time spent finding a parking spot left me with only 10 minutes to make the walk to the club. Funny thing is I knew where the club was, but couldn't figure out how to walk there (one sidewalk closeby was closed). I did stroll up to the gate at exactly 9:30, while the band was in full swing, playing "Join Me In Death." I found out from the ticket window lady that the band had gone on at 9:11, so I missed a couple of songs.
I'd heard that HIM played a short set and that the singer, Ville (who was born on the anniversary of the JFK assasination, by the way), smoked incessently during the show and hurt his performance. I hoped this wouldn't be the case, as the band had so much going for them (imaging, songs, sound, and it doesn't hurt to have Bam Magera touting you as "the best band in the world"). My first indication was that they were a great live band, as "Join Me In Death" sounded clean, seductive, powerful, and heavy. However, as they launched into heavier songs, "Behind The Crimson Door," "Drunk On Shadows" and even "Rip Out The Wings Of A Butterfly," the sonics would be muddied by an uncontrolled bottom end that made it hard to hear the vocals. When they slowed down for a piano-based song, like "KIlling Loneliness," the mix was great. But anything mid-tempo or above that was accompanied by chugging bass and guitar, like the cool adaptation they do to the Chris Isaak cover of "Wicked Game" become barely recognizable when the vocals can only be heard once the rhythm drops out.
Sadly, this makes their show little more than a celebration of their songs, minus the quality. Perhaps they need a new soundman. Several hundred screaming fans didn't seem to mind, but man their albums sound so much better.
In chapter 17 of Rees Howells, Intercessor the topic of not wearing a hat comes up again. Apparently, in those times, not wearing a hat outdoors was just unheard of. After Howells had given the leadership of the mission over to this other guy, he was invited to speak in London again. However, he didn't want to go simply because he didn't want to be seen in London without a hat! He was still in the midst of an "intercession" about something, and part of his "abiding" in the Lord and perservering in prayer was to keep his hat off, as one often does while praying. He had faced this hatless embarrassment in the country where he lived, but he couldn't bear the thought of being seen in London this way. His host, Mr. Gosset, met him at the train station and stuck his head in the compartment and said, "You've forgotten your hat!" Howells told him, "No, I didn't bring one with me," to which Gosset replied, "What! Coming to London without a hat! O dear no! You must realize, Rees, that you are not in the country now. You cannot come to London without a hat."
This was a serious predicament for Howells. Gosset even offered him one of his new, very expensive hats, but Howells told him that, "if I were given all the caps in London for wearing one that side of Christmas, I would not take them, because to go without a hat was one of my positions of abiding to gain a place of intercession." It's a good thing to remain obedient and true -- especially in the face of pressure like that.
One thing I've noticed about anything similar to that in my life is I almost rely on that past event too much. It's nice to have a memory of a time when you obeyed the Lord in something. Having "markers" in your life are good, as they remind you of God's faithfulness. We as humans need those kind of reminders. This is possibly the only reason God had His people set up markers and monuments about His faithfulness to them during the Exodus from Egypt.
But I cannot ever afford to say, "I was obedient then. I don't need to be now. I want to grow and press on, building from one place to another. I rejoice over the very real things that the Lord has done in my life, but I can't find satisfaction in those memories. I can only find satisfaction in Him, and He's on the move. He doesn't rest in one place too long. Growth will come from moving with Him. Who knows what that will be like?
Breaking the law! Breaking the law!
I was previewing the new Saint disc yesterday and watched some Rock Honors show on VH-1 last night, which had all-star tribute bands and metal classic bands. All American Rejects, I think, were covering a Def Leppard song, and then Def Leppard came out. Judas Priest played. And then I finished the Saint album on the way home. Boy, it sure sounds like Priest...
In chapter 16 of Rees Howells, Intercessor, he talks about his call to daily intercession. His life was so busy that he hardly had time for prayer. He worked at the mine from 7 am to 4:30 pm and then went into the village mission for nightly meetings, five days a week were in meetings and two were just for hanging out or visiting (whatever "visiting" means). The only time he had alone for prayer was his two mile walk to and from the village. When walking he would remove his hat and pray.
What was weird is that no man at the time would ever be seen outdoors without a hat. It was such a strong custom that it freaked Howells out if he was seen this way. The Lord called him to remain in a state of prayer all day, which meant he wouldn't wear his hat all day long. He basically pleaded for the Lord to take away this command, but was informed that his fear of the public, fear of man, fear of the world's opinion needed to be broken. So he did it, but what a trial. How funny is that? Today I don't even feel a need to take my hat off indoors or even for prayer. Many people still carry that tradition around, but it's never been a Scriptural law that has meant much to me. Sometimes out of respect, when I'm thinking about it, I'll remove a hat when in prayer. But I often don't even think about it.
He also faced another trial when one of his good friends in the mission was being told by a bunch of people, "You'll never reach your potential working under him. You need to start your own ministry.' Howells saw this coming and through prayer decided he'd do what the enemy told this man would never happen, he turned over the Mission to his friend, taking the role of a prayer support behind him. That was a good way to avoid the tearing-apart tension that a "Paul vs. Apollos" situation would bring.
P.S. Be sure to check out the Intern Diaries, with our new guy, Rand Renfrow.