"Before we go any further, does anyone have any dam questions about the Hoover dam?" The writers for National Lampoon couldn't resist that one when Chevy Chase and his Griswalds family take the Hoover Dam tour.
Don Miller describes the Grand Canyon and he remarks at how breathtaking it really is, making a strong case for not taking anyone's word for it (or even the fine photos from National Geographic), but we must all see this wonderful sight.
Some of the details about the trip into the canyon bug me. They have to pay x-amount of money just to get in, x-amount to camp, they must get permits to hike, and they must make reservations to camp at the various camp sites on the way down. I guess it wouldn't bother me if I knew it coming in and was prepared. I've never been the type of person to carry money that I knew would be spent for unexpected things. I try to be calculated and saved my money for specific things. If I have cash on me, though, and I see something cool, I buy it -- especially if it's on sale. For example, recently I was in a Sports Authority store and saw some Dallas Cowboys stuff. They had Keyshawn Johnson bobbleheads on clearance for 99 cents. Do I need a Keyshawn Johnson bobblehead? No, but at one dollar, I didn't want to pass it by. You never know, I might be able to sell it on ebay for $20.
Don's got me convinced, though. I need to see the Grand Canyon. I've seen part of what is called the Grand Canyon, but didn't stop and take it all in. We'll have to do that sometime. Don's humor is found in every chapter, but this one has it on display well. When told they'd have to get permits to hike, Don whipped out his Blockbuster card and laid it on the counter, as if it would take care of all their needs. He gave the girl at the Information Center. Then, when they talked to the guy in charge of handing out hiking permits, they were told that it was a tough hike and if they had any physical problems, they should probably forgo the trip. If someone had a heart attack down there, they'd be too far to get aid to in time. And they couldn't land a helicopter in there to get 'em out, so they'd just throw the dead bodies in the river and then fish 'em out at the dam. It's funny how creative people can be when they know they have information that others don't or they're in a context where questions arise.
I remember one of our early out-of-state gigs with my band Lust Control. We were booked at the New Union club in Minneapolis, which was cancelled and we were re-routed to an all-ages teen club in Fridley, MN just weeks before the show (but that's another story). On the plane ride there, Mitch (our guitarist, otherwise known by his middle name, "Bradford") and I pulled a funny one on our gullible bass player, John (aka "Butch"). At the end of our flight we both adjusted our watches.
"What are you doing?" asked John.
"Just adjusting our watches for jet lag." When knew we had him, so we took it further. "The plane travels at the speed of light. The pilots actually see red when they look out there window. Behind us everything looks blue. We have to adjust our watches by 5 or 10 minutes to adjust for this. That's what jet lag is all about."
He knew we were lying by then, but we'd already entered into that "fun times" area that makes good memories.
Posted by Doug Van Pelt at November 14, 2006 09:27 AM